The Bestest Girl

My life as best as I know it… personal & professional

Bumper to Bumper May 19, 2011

Filed under: Life — sephrahosein @ 19:01

I got stuck in a total of 3 hours of traffic today… Took a break from the traffic and stopped off at a mall in central… I really really really needed to pee!! Plus I was starving to death and was in desperate need of breakfast. So after my much appreciated break I was back on the road again, in traffic of course but I was not upset or mad. I was actually in a good mood. I got in the office at 10:00 am but it was a great morning…

Sometimes I forget that I am actually the only one who can control my emotions and that whatever affects me, be it positively or negatively, affects me because I allow it. Being happy is simple. It’s a choice. Sometimes I forget that I have the option; after all I am human, but I’m glad I chose to be happy regardless of the traffic this morning because it made a big difference in how my day went… If only I could remember these things all the time! Now I’m not saying it’s as easy as pie, I mean choosing to be happy is easy, anyone can say “I choose to be happy”, but actually making the effort to be happy, that’s hard, it sure does take a lot of yourself to be happy. So I guess that would explain the down days… Maybe on my down days I’m too tired to make the effort to be happy… Ha.. Epiphany! Then again, why does it take no effort at all to be grumpy, depressed, all the negatives, but it takes hard work to be happy? hmm, food for thought..

 

My Angel May 18, 2011

Filed under: The Sweet n' Sours of The Heart — sephrahosein @ 09:53

My Angel by The Bestest Girl

Little bright brown eyes peeping through

To a world unknown but I’m here for you

To touch your skin is like nothing before

Your sweet angel smile I’ll forever adore

Heaven is to hold you, to watch you sleep

It breaks my heart every time you weep

I will protect you from all that is hurtful

Don’t ever forget that you are beautiful

Terrified of the day you leave my side

Will you remember me with arms open wide?

My life, my world, it all belongs to you

If nothing else, to you I’ll always be true

Destroyed the day you were taken from my side

You must know that my arms were open wide

 

Insufferable May 16, 2011

Filed under: Life — sephrahosein @ 15:34

My eyes are burning… Either due to lack of sleep or the jackass who decided to cut gypsum right outside the office door… I’m tending towards the latter. While I have no major allergies, some fine particles, depending on its nature, causes me to break out in hives if I’m exposed to it. Gypsum is on the list. I told ASSHOLE Vinnie (the so-called maintenance man here) about it but he ignored me. Oh well, I guess I could do with a couple days off if I do indeed break out in hives. I have so much work to do and while I’m trying to stick to progressive elaboration, it’s somehow not getting any better. This job of mine has reached beyond the point of insufferable. My work load is ridiculously high. So I’m on a one man strike… Well more like work to rule. I’m gonna quit at 4 pm (the time I’m taking to blog here is time I worked through lunch so I’m taking it back!). Wow, that’s half an hour away… seems like forever.

I’m gonna attempt to bake bread this afternoon, under the guidance of my mom of course, considering I know nothing  about baking bread. Anyways, it’s supposed to be a relaxing thing.. I enjoy cooking. It’s almost like a hobbie of mine. One day, when I get out of this shit hole I’ll open my dream restaurant…  ahh…

 

My Addiction May 14, 2011

Filed under: The Sweet n' Sours of The Heart — sephrahosein @ 09:49

I am no expert writer nor great poet, just forming some words with my thoughts…


My Addiction by The Bestest Girl


I wanna take a ride on your endless high

Like a blazing star baby, I’m up in the sky

Your aura is like a rush to my brain

Don’t let this intoxication die in vain

It’s hard to breathe every time you’re near

My blood sizzles under your intense stare

You got me climbing walls sugar; skin on skin

How long will I hold this passion within?

I’m smiling down to the depths of my soul

Your unique sense of being has me on a roll

One in a million honey, dance with me

Share my euphoria, maybe its destiny

 

I am Who I am May 13, 2011

Filed under: Life — sephrahosein @ 00:27

Who am I? I am smart. I am funny in my own way, I have a sense of humour. I choose to laugh at certain things rather than get upset about it. I am generally a happy person. I prefer to be pleasant to other people. I do not judge others but rather try to understand them. We are all different and that’s what makes us all normal. What is “normal” anyway? If nobody’s normal then we’re all normal. I try to make everyone around me happy. I genuinely care for those who my spirit takes to.  How I treat people is very important to me regardless of how they treat me. It is in my blood to be nice to people. I believe in being humble and I am very big on manners and how I speak to other people. I am extremely empathetic and maybe this is why I try to be kind to others. I hate to see people sad or upset. I am not a saint. I am selfish at times. Although being good is a big part of who I am, I am sometimes bad. I stand up for myself when needed, I don’t fight all the battles that come my way. I just fight the ones that really matter. Some people see that as me being a pushover but I guess they don’t know me well enough to see that I am strong and I don’t allow people to use me. I take the time to get to know people. Not judging them or turning them away at first glance is why I take the time. Humans are such amazing creatures, you never know what they’ll pull out of themselves and it may be bad or even good. I am a nerd if being a nerd means finding pleasure in the simpler things in life or in a game of scrabble or simply expressing my awe at a rainbow. I am who I am and although most people try to change these things about me, try to make me “tough”, I know what I am about and I will not let petty things in life change who I am. We live in a harsh world, where is the love? If everyone cares only for their own selves, how then would we change the world? How would we make it a better place for us and our loved ones to live? God put us here to serve Him by serving man. I am grateful to Him that I see and understand this. And I wake up every morning thanking Him for His blessings and favors on me and most important of all, I thank Him for making me a blessing for someone.

 

Mother’s Day May 8, 2011

Filed under: Life — sephrahosein @ 09:41

Well it’s another mother’s day and some things I figure will never change. Like my mom’s attitude towards certain things. I’m not sure what kind of relationship to call ours but it’s definitely not close, neither is it estranged. Somewhere in the middle I guess. I don’t know what to make of it. All I know is that I possess several of the qualities that my mother has. Good and bad ones I think. I think one of my fears is that I will turn out to be exactly like her. I know I need to start thinking positively about it so that I don’t turn out exactly like her because sometimes you can actually see how miserable she really is. Even though we have our differences in opinions from time to time (as with everyone else), I actually feel sorry for her sometimes and part of me wishes to see her happy. After all, she is my mother.

 

The Civil Engineer That I am May 7, 2011

Filed under: The World of Civil Engineering — sephrahosein @ 14:20

So this is me… (apparently I like starting sentences with the word “so”)… Anyways, So this is me, a civil engineer for approximately five years now. Soon I’ll be a registered engineer. Whatever that means! (kidding). The thing is, while I love the engineering world, and while I, for the most part, enjoy my job, I’m not sure this is where my heart belongs. Some people may scuff at that remark since they think it is oh so “great” to be an engineer and I should be happy, the truth is, I’m not sure if I’m truly happy. I don’t know why. I’ve been working in the Geotechnical Department for all of my five years of working life so far and sometimes I feel as if I do more administrative work as opposed to engineering. I mean, have I really learned anything substantial? I spend so much time managing and so little time actually engineering. Is this why I am not feeling the engineering vibe? The next thing too is while I love that we as civil engineers have been supposedly granted the opportunity to contribute in some way or the other to the development of our society I somehow feel that that’s not really happening here. So far, all that I’ve been exposed to is pretty much generic. I mean, what the hell happened to innovation? Maybe it is simply that I work in an “old fashion” engineering company but then again, very rarely do I ever come across the application of new technology in the construction industry in our country. 20/20 my ass! For the uniformed, vision 20/20 in my country is a term used by our past prime minister in hopes of achieving first world status by the year 2020. What bull that is. I’ll probably blog about that some other time since it’s too much to talk about now. Anyways, back to my maybe senseless ranting… or writing… (who cares really, I just need to get this out of my head)…

Yes, where was I? Oh right, engineering. The sad thing about my life is that I’m so busy managing projects I rarely get time to really read up on things to keep myself informed about the world. Then there’s also the memory factor… Stuff I do get a chance to read often goes right out of my mind. They don’t even stick around to just chill out or anything… Is the ambiance in my mind not enjoyable enough? hmmm… Something there to think about. I think I need to get out of the geotechnical department and give another field of civil a try. Maybe in doing so I might rekindle the love for this profession of mine. I really would like to practice coastal engineering. As nerdy as that sounds, it’s what I did my final project and special investigative project on during my degree. I really enjoyed it. Too bad there’s not much coastal engineering being done in Trinidad.

Oh, once again, for the uniformed, geotechnical engineering entails the study of the engineering properties of soil, using principles of soil mechanics,  to establish the most suitable types of foundations for the construction of several types of structures, roads, bridges, buildings, retaining walls etc. It also deals with addressing difficult ground conditions during construction etc. That’s a really summarized summary of what geotechnical engineering is. In addition to all that my job also entails the study/testing of materials for construction; asphalt, concrete and aggregates.

Wow, now I felt as if I spent a hard day at work. Great…